Plumber Builds World's Fastest Toilet!

You gotta love this! Englishman Colin Furze, 33, has spent four weeks building the gas powered toilet which boasts a powerful 140cc motorbike engine and can travel at 55mph. The high-speed toilet has been fitted with a button on the handle bars, so it can be flushed on the move, and a clip so he can read his favorite newspaper. ‘It is quite scary to drive as the water in the toilet makes it very top heavy and I get wet when I go over any bumps,’ said Colin, from Stamford in Lincolnshire, England. ‘The toilet seat is also quite slippery so it’s hard to stay on and stop myself from sliding off when I go fast. It’s also pretty tricky to steer.’ The plumber regularly gets called out to fix and install toilets so decided to build the contraption as a bit of fun. Four electronic gears have also been fitted to the handlebars, while a towel rail and toilet roll holder have also been installed. ‘I’m a plumber and I’m used to putting toilets together so I thought I’d try the challenge of making the fastest,’ said Furze. ‘I’ve seen people build them before using mopeds, but I’ve given mine a more powerful engine so it can go much faster.’ The previous fastest toilet was the Bog Standard, which could travel at 42.25mph and was unveiled in Milan, Italy in March 2011. So if he were able to sell a bunch of these, would that make him “flush” with success? Just wondering.

How You Can Remember....

Today is Memorial Day, and although it's a great day for picnics, parties, boating and more, please don't forget to take some time and remember what the day is all about! Here is a list of the events in our area today.

La Crosse: A parade begins at 9 a.m. at Fifth and King streets. A service is at 10 a.m. at Oak Grove Cemetery and at noon at Riverside Park.

Onalaska: A parade begins at 9:30 a.m. at the American Legion, Sand Lake Road, and travels to the Onalaska Veterans Memorial in Onalaska Cemetery for a ceremony.

Holmen: Parade starts at 9 a.m. at Holmen Middle School and proceeds south on Main Street to the ceremony at Halfway Creek Park.

Bangor: A ceremony will begin at 9 a.m. at Bangor High School with VFW and American Legion members in attendance. The speaker will be Lt. Anthony Campbell. After the ceremony at the high school, there will be a brief memorial at Fairview Cemetery.

Ho-Chunk Nation: The Ho-Chunk Nation will hold its annual Memorial Day Pow-Wow Saturday-Monday at the Andrew Blackhawk Memorial Pow-Wow Grounds, Black River Falls. Grand entries will take place at 1 and 7 p.m. Saturday and Sunday and noon Monday, when a flag raising will take place.

Tomah: The Tomah Department of Veterans Affairs Medical Center will hold its annual observation at 1:30 p.m. Friday on the front steps of Building 400 on the Tomah VA campus. Col. Tim Lawson will be the keynote speaker and the Tomah High School Band will perform.

Coon Valley: A Memorial Day parade starts at 10:30 a.m. at Coon Valley. A lunch served by the Legion Auxiliary is afterward.

Melrose: A legionnaires muster will be held at 8:15 a.m. at Melrose Legion Hall. A march to Melrose Cemetery is at 8:45 a.m. Programs will be held at North Bend Cemetery at 10:20 a.m., Cataract Cemetery at 10:30 a.m. and South Beaver Creek Cemetery at 11 a.m.

De Soto: De Soto VFW Post 8123 will conduct the following services: 9:30 a.m.; Walnut Mountain Retreat, 10 a.m.; West Prairie, 10:30 a.m.; Rising Sun, 11 a.m.; Freeman Lutheran, 11:30 a.m.; and Ferryville at noon. There will be a free cookout for veterans from 1 to 3 p.m. at the De Soto Community Center.

La Crescent, Minn.: A Memorial Day parade will start at 11:30 a.m. on Walnut Street. Marching units include the American Legion Color Guard, the La Crescent Fire Department, Gold Star mother, the Auxiliary Poppy Queen, the La Crescent High School Band, Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts, all marching to Veterans Park for an 11:45 a.m. program. A chickencue dinner afterward is at the Legion.

Hokah, Minn.: The Hokah American Legion Post 498 will lay a wreath in the Root River at 8:30 a.m. to honor those lost at sea. A parade begins at 9 a.m. at City Hall and proceeds to Veterans Park where an address will be given. The program continues with graveside services at Mount Hope and Mount Calvary cemeteries. A picnic will be served after the program.

Brownsville, Minn.: A memorial service will take place at Veterans Cemetery by the VFW Post and Auxiliary at 10 a.m. A program at the Brownsville Community Center is at 10:45 a.m. At 11:30 a.m., there will be a march to the river for a service at 11:45 a.m., and a noon potluck dinner at the community center.

Houston, Minn.: A memorial service will take place at 10 a.m. in Houston City Park, sponsored by American Legion Post 423. In case of rain, the service will be at Houston High School. This year's event includes the dedication of a new veterans memorial.

She Did It!

Way to go Country Music! Kellie Pickler and her partner Derek Hough won Dancing With The Stars live on ABC TV last night. After doing a quick jive dance and being asked to do an encore of their dance from Monday night, the couple took home the top prize. When Kellie's name was announced at the end of the show she seemed not to hear it and Hough had to tell her to which she jumped and looked rather shocked. With her grandpa Ken – who talked her into doing the show - in the crowd, Pickler was hoisted onto another dancer's shoulders as they whole crew celebrated. 

Oklahoma Devastation

Natural disasters, like tornadoes scare the hell out of me. They are so powerful, unpredictable and quick.  Those in it's path rarely have but a few minutes to react and find a safe place to hide, if they're lucky.

It always seems even more devastating when it's kids that comprise the biggest fatality numbers too.  I mean no disrespect to those adults who also perished, but the innocence of children's lives being snatched away just breaks my heart.  The question, "Why?" always seems to run through one's mind after something like this happens.  There is obviously no answer for that question and that's what makes it even more heart-wrenching.  Reading reports of children clinging to walls during the tornado or being sucked into the air was enough to create a huge deluge of tears streaming down my face.  I'm sick for the parents who are left to pick up the pieces and try to put their lives back together in the aftermath.

It's times like this that we all want to reach out and help--somehow.  And it's not always practical to just pick up and go down and volunteer.  Donating funds is always a good way to provide the much needed aid.  The American Red Cross is always on the scene to assist with natural disasters and they are a wonderful organization to receive your donations.

I also came across another great group that is quite unique in the face of disasters like this: Team Rubicon.  They unite the skills and experiences of military veterans with first responders to rapidly deploy emergency response teams.  They are also on the front lines down in Oklahoma today.

If donating to help is just not feasible--I'm quite certain that prayers for those who are suffering are quite acceptable too.  Take a moment and count your blessings today.  Life can change in the blink of an eye.  Don't take anything for granted.

I Didn't Win Either...

But did we REALLY expect to win?  I enjoy the hopeful feeling of winning as I gaze at my numbers leading up to the drawing.  I LOVE fantasizing about what I would do with the money.  I think that's actually the best part about Powerball.  It gets us thinking what we would do with an obscene amount of money.

In addition to paying off my mortgage, my sibling's mortgages and helping some other family members out financially, I'd make a huge donation to Children's Miracle Network Hospitals.  But I'd also explore some quirky things...

Like a monster Lego playhouse for all of my nieces and nephews and my husband's grandkids to play in when they come to visit.  It would have to be at least three stories tall and have those awesome window shutters on it.  And giant lego people with the goofy round hole hands.

I'd also want to have a roller coaster at my house.  I realize that would require a lot of permits and more land to lay it out, but hey--if I won almost $600-million--permits and land would not be an issue.  I'd love to start every morning with a roller coaster run.  And of course, the neighborhood kids could also ride for free.

I wouldn't mind owning bunch of race cars and a kick arse team to maintain them.  Then I could help some up-and-coming drivers and even some older ones who have tremendous talent, and help them gain recognition to rise to the top of the racing world.  I've heard that race car owners who don't race can be really crazy people.  I would embrace that.

What would you do with your millions if you won?  Drop us an email!

Messin' With Mickey!

This is the saddest thing ever to happen at the Happiest Place on Earth. According to an expose in the New York Post, some wealthy families are hiring handicapped people to pose as relatives and accompany their children through Disney theme parks- so they can enjoy line-skipping privileges! Disney parks allow wheelchair-bound guests- along with up to six companions- to bypass long lines and use more convenient entrances. Anyone with the money to burn can get a legitimate fast pass through the park’s official VIP tour service which lets them jump the lines ($310-$380 per hour). But in-the-know moms say the “black market” handicapped guides are a better deal at $130 per hour or $1,040 per day. It’s a sad world after all. What do you think of rich families hiring handicapped people to help their kids skip the lines at Disney? Should the park crack down on this practice? Click here to read more!

O.J. Then....And Now!

Wow! Did you see the "before and after" pics of O.J. Simpson? Sure, we all age, but what a difference when you look at his pictures side-by-side. A plumper, grayer O.J. Simpson appeared in a Las Vegas courtroom yesterday, in a bid to get his 2008 armed robbery conviction overturned. The 65-year-old is currently serving 9 to 33 years after a jury found him guilty of leading a sports memorabilia heist in a Vegas hotel room. Simpson claims his legal representation mishandled the case and is seeking to have his conviction thrown out. Simpson is arguing that his ex-lawyer, Yale Galanter, gave him bad advice. Simpson claims he seized sports memorabilia that belonged to him because Galanter told him it would be legal to do so. Simpson was famously acquitted of the murders of his wife and her friend in 1995. Remember the famous quote form the trial, "If the glove doesn't fit, you have to acquit"? These days it's, "If the pants don't fit, the prison gym you'd better hit!"

Meet Baby Magnus!

Jennifer Nettles of Sugarland recently revealed the first picture of her five-month-old son, Magnus Hamilton. Nettles and her husband, Justin Miller, welcomed Baby Magnus late last year and the singer took to her blog on Mother's Day to share not only the picture, but a very special message as well. Jennifer began the message by saying, "On December 6, 2012 my life was forever changed. I had a baby! Magnus Hamilton Miller was born healthy, hungry and with way more hair than I was expecting after seeing baby pictures of both me and my husband. Needless to say, especially to those of you who have children, the rhythm of my life is way different than the movement and pace before baby. In short, this baby is the boss of me." In her message, Nettles also talked about her new life as a mother and how much she has learned about herself. She talked about getting great advice from family and friends as well as being a sleep deprived mother. Jennifer concluded the message by thanking her fans for their support and well wishes. She said, "I have appreciated all of your supportive messages and tweets as I have been giving myself the space to enjoy this most sacred, precious time. However, I am also bursting at the seams with pride! And so, it gives me great pleasure to say to you - Meet Magnus." The entire message and photo can be viewed at http://www.jennifernettles.com/news.html?n_id=127.

Welcome To Whiskey Row!

Dierks Bentley will open a bar in his hometown of Scottsdale, Arizona this summer. The bar will be called Whiskey Row and the grand opening is set for July 4. Bentley has teamed up with owners of Riot Hospitality Group and operators of El Hefe Super Macho Taqueria for the venue that is described as a throwback 1920's style saloon with a modern country vibe. Dierks says, "Opening a bar in my hometown is something I've always wanted to do. These guys have spent a lot of time and put a lot of thought into really cool details that will make it the perfect place to watch a game or listen to music or just get a few drinks with friends. I'm looking forward to helping break it in." The bar's drink menu will offer 40 different types of whiskey and all food items will be made from scratch in house, using only organic meats and locally farmed produce. Whiskey Row will also feature a 360-degree stage and giant 24 foot TV. USB and iPhone charging stations will also be available at the bar. Each booth will feature three different beer taps as well as the first liquor tap of its kind in Arizona. The hi-tech taps will give patrons the ability to pour their own beer and shots right at the table. Click here to take a look at the bar's website!

"No Fat Chicks," says Abercrombie & Fitch CEO

If you believe that it pays to treat others as you would like to be treated and you strive to be a "good person," you might want to reconsider allowing your child to wear clothing from and ultimately supporting the company Abercrombie & Fitch.  

CEO Mike Jeffries says that his company deliberately does not carry XL or XXL sizes for women.  The largest pant size they carry is a 10 for women.  Why?  Because Jeffries says that he doesn't want overweight women wearing his clothing.  His core customers should never see fat people wearing their clothing, nor should they be subjected to seeing fat people perusing the racks at his store.  Jeffries only wants to surround his product with "beautiful, thin people."

In a 2006 interview with Salon, Jeffries was asked a rather pointed question about the tone of his advertising as one that sells sex to kids or is borderline homoerotic at times and he got incredibly defensive.  "I think that what we represent is sexually healthy.  It's playful.  It's not dark.  It's not degrading!  And it's not gay, and it's not straight, it's not black and it's not white.  It's not about any labels."

Except that it is.  Jeffries went on to candidly discuss the mentality behind his marketing, "In every school, there are the cool kids and the not-so-cool kids.  We go after the cool kids."  And backed that comment up saying that the not-so-cool kids do not belong in his clothing.

Yeah, no labels there.

Now while my first instinct is to hunt this guy down and get creative with a nail gun, I decided to step back for a minute and think about it.  Then I googled up an image of this Mike Jeffries.

I'm going to go out on a limb and venture a guess that Mr. Jeffries was not one of the "cool kids" growing up and he's making up for it by profiting off of said "cool kids" these days.  And then in effect, alienating the group that he likely was once a poster child for:  the "not-so-cool kids."  Unfortunate that Mr. Jeffries decided to not use his experience and know-how to make a better statement to prevent such labels, instead of perpetuating them.

The marketer in me understands his mentality, but the human in me is repulsed by it.  But then, I guess that's advertising at it's grittiest.  Either way, there is NO way I will ever look at the Abercrombie & Fitch nameplate the same.  And there's no way I would EVER allow anyone I care about wear the clothes without sharing the back story on the brand with them.

I'm a chubby gal, so it would be impossible for me to ever be able to buy his clothing, so a boycott would be fruitless from my standpoint.  Instead, I choose to spread the word.  Knowledge is real power.  A good hearted person will always shine brighter and longer than a good body on a person.  Most of the kids sporting the A&F brand will eventually learn that lesson as they age.  Ah yes, aging is the cruel equalizer, isn't it?

I learned the lesson about not judging a book by it's cover a long time ago.  It's one that would serve today's youth well and even Mr. Jeffries too.  What do you think?  Drop us an email.

Saying Goodbye To The Possum

The funeral for George Jones will take place at The Grand Ole Opry House in Nashville starting at 10 AM CT today. The service will be open to the public and doors will open at 9 AM. The funeral service will also be broadcast live on the national television networks CMT, GAC, RFD, and FamilyNet. The service for the legendary singer will include music from Charlie Daniels, Vince Gill, Patty Loveless, Alan Jackson, Ronnie Milsap, Kid Rock, The Oak Ridge Boys, Brad Paisley, Randy Travis, Travis Tritt, Tanya Tucker and Wynonna. Former First Lady Laura Bush, Kenny Chesney, Barbara Mandrell, Grand Ole Opry VP&GM Pete Fisher, Tennessee Governor Bill Haslam, former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee, and CBS News' Chief Washington Correspondent Bob Schieffer will all make special remarks.

Kenny Gives To Boston Victims

We love it when country stars step forward to help out a great cause! Kenny Chesney has established the "Spread the Love Fund" to help victims of the Boston Marathon bombings get the help they need. The fund will work with Boston Medical Center to help pay for prosthetics as well as the ongoing care and physical therapy the victims will require. Additionally, all proceeds from the download sales of Chesney's song, "Spread The Love," will go to the fund. The song was co-written and recorded with The Wailers and appears on Kenny's new album, Life on a Rock, which was released yesterday. Chesney says, "It's hard to imagine a world where taking your children to school, going to the movies or witnessing something as iconic as the Boston Marathon is a dangerous thing to do. For me, I want to help give these people as much of their lives back as possible, but I'd also like to counteract some of the negativity in the world . . . Remind people that there are more good people out there, and it’s up to us to 'Spread the Love.'"